Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Kitty's dream of March 3, 2009

Make sense of this, if you can.

I was taking a piano lesson with my college piano professor when he and another professor threw their coats over my head and hustled me out of the building. I said, "Oh no! Not another SAI kidnapping!" (SAI was the music sorority I was in in college and they don't do kidnappings.) They asked me, "How old are you?" and I wasn't sure if they meant how old am I now or how old was I in college. Eventually they took me a house where I was the person being surprised on a show kind of like "This Is Your Life" but it had to do with how charming you are. (FYI, I am not charming at all.) It was hosted by Shirley MacLaine. My college roommates were there (who know exactly how uncharming I am). Apparently they had nominated me and were prompting me to share my "charming" memories with Shirley. A wedding party came through that featured an elderly topless bride who just wanted to say hello and in the hubbub, I saw William Shatner outside and realized he was my surprise guest. After things settled down, the room got dark and Shirley said, "Is everyone ready to go on?" and by the Bill was in the room and he said, "I'm ready." No mistaking that voice! I went over to where he was sitting in this cushy chair with his feet up on an ottoman. He had on gym socks. I started rubbing his feet and telling him I have a thing for feet. He got embarrassed! Yes, Bill! Then Jason Alexander got in the chair with him. I said, "I'll stop rubbing your feet if you'll get Costanza out of there." Exit JA, entrez moi.